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Many daters associate divorced people with excess baggage.

While there can be some red flags (like if his relationship ended because he was unfaithful), people who've been through a divorce tend to have a deeper, more realistic perspective on marriage than those haven't.

Don’t get upset when she’s around (whether physically or in his thoughts).

Just remind yourself that she is part of his reality that you can’t change.

We asked experts—and women who've dated (and even married!

) divorcés—to explain the many upsides to seeing a formerly married man.1. As a marriage unravels, "wives are pretty verbal about what they perceive their husbands did wrong," whether it be too much time at the office or being an awful communicator, says marriage and family therapist Rachel Sussman.

"Many men have openly shared with me that they'd love to 'make a marriage right this time.'" Andrea, 47, who met her husband on Christian Mingle.com, experienced this phenomenon first-hand.

"Divorced men have experience sharing finances, a home and schedules. Talking about the future doesn't prompt most divorced guys to run for the hills the way it might lifelong older bachelors.I only dated because my ex had a girlfriend, and it was my way to personally retaliate. Starting to date again can be an overwhelming experience. I needed to work through my personal issues before I could be successful in dating.Fortunately, I had the help of a wonderful professional counselor who helped me move forward.If your guy is newly separated and in the process of getting the divorce finalized, you might want to check out Dating Advice: You, Him, and Not Quite Ex Wife!for extra advice on the special challenges a not-yet-divorced man poses.When I got married over five years ago, I wondered how things might be different after we tied the knot. Would making a formal commitment really matter in our relationship? I know that dating a divorced (or divorcing) man can be a challenging field to navigate, which is why I created Happy Healthy Relationship: to help you overcome relationship challenges, gain clarity on whether he's right for you, and discover how to find and create deeply fulfilling relationships.He already had two children already and even though in the first instance he said he wanted to have another with me, I knew that he had started to change his mind 3 months in as I could sense it and I ignored the signs as I didn't want to face the consequences of that outcome.Instead, confront your situation head on (if you want kids with a divorced guy) especially if he has children already.These can be great perks," says licensed psychotherapist Tina B. They're also more "willing to share their feelings and tackle the tough topics," says relationship expert Lori Bizzoco, founder of Cupids "Men who are divorced enjoy companionship that they were familiar with having been married before," says La Pronda, 43, who's dated both never-married and divorced men."They don't shy away from a conversation about relationships, marriage, love and intimacy." Adds Bizzoco, "Even though his previous marriage didn't work out, dating shows he's willing to open himself up to love and that he's interested in something serious again."4. Men naturally want to "fix" things and problem solve, life coach and dating expert Brooke Lewis points out, which can translate into a post-divorce desire for a successful new relationship.Many women go straight to their girlfriends for advice on dating and relationships when a professional source is needed.An unbiased professional -- someone who sees issues objectively -- is a better choice.Having dated a divorced guy, I can speak from experience of what to do and the mistakes to avoid if you do decide to go down this path with a divorced guy, especially if they have kids.DATING MISTAKE 1: I ignored the signs of his opinion on kids.




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